A 30 Minute Mini-Retreat - Using Visual Images

Feeling off-kilter, but with no time to retreat?

Try this - 15-30 minutes is all you need.

A "One Image" Retreat

Pour a mug or glass of your favorite beverage and get into comfy clothes.  If you enjoy music, put on some relaxing or upbeat music - whatever appeals to you in this moment.  Grab a stack of magazines from around the house or at your local newsstand (3-5 is plenty).  Get an assortment - even those that seem dry or "all business" can work for this retreat.

Take a sip of your beverage, and then close your eyes and take several deep cleansing breaths.  If you'd like, do this standing up and incorporate a bit of movement with your breaths.  Or just sit quietly and invite your body to relax.

Then, sit down with your pile of magazines, and just start paging through them, looking for images that appeal to you.  Don't overthink this, just go with what appeals to you for any reason.  Settle on one (or at most two) that seem to be resonating the most at this moment.  Again, don't overthink this, just go with whatever rises to the surface.  There is no right or wrong, and there is no "perfect" image.

Don't move on until you've selected an image.

Then, simply sit and reflect on that image for several minutes, seeing what messages, thoughts or feelings it brings up.  Stay with it for a while, allowing (but not forcing or requiring) layers of meaning to emerge.  If you'd like, write or sketch or doodle or move a bit about what came up.

Whether or not the image has proven meaningful, post it where you will see it again in the next several days, and invite new meaning to emerge.

Give a silent "thank you" to the Universe for this time of retreat, for the relaxation of this time, and for any wisdom that has emerged, and return to your daily life refreshed by this little break.

Don't Be So Serious - Play!

Some people think of retreats as somewhat somber or serious or "deep" affairs.

And they certainly can be.  People frequently take retreats is to sort out a troubling issue or clear out some negativity that has built up.  And so the energy of retreat is often introspective, inward facing, quiet, and yes, somewhat "serious."  And amidst that energy one often finds in retreat a wellspring of quiet but very real joy.

But retreats do not have to be solo, quiet or serious.  They can be playful, fun, and creative.

In these dark, cold days of winter, it can be especially challenging to keep the spirit of play alive.

I recently stumbled across the "Society of the Secret Play Date."  Productivity through play - what a great way to spend a One Hour Retreat!    I haven't tried this yet, but here's the link, if you want to check it out:  http://smartsandculture.com/blog/2011/april/play-date-04-05.

And don't give me any of that "I'm just not creative" baloney.  I don't consider myself particularly artistic, but incorporating play and creativity into my days and weeks makes me a lot happier and more fun to be around - and more productive too.

Other ways you can play:

• Turn on the radio and dance (no one is watching...)
• Use crayons or markers to color in a coloring book
• Knit, crochet, quilt, etc.
• Write or record a short story for your child or grandchild - you know all her favorite themes
• Bake
• Build a snowman (go with the flow of winter, rather than fighting it)
• Be like Fred Astaire and sing in the rain
• Take a class - learn something new
• Take a "field trip" to a local attraction you've never been to
• Take in a performance you usually wouldn't (try hip-hop if you're a ballet nut, and vice versa)
• Trade knock-knock jokes with a grade-schooler
• Watch your favorite funny movie
• [your ideas here]

I’ve been thinking a lot about play lately.  It just seems to keep coming up – my friends and my clients are all complaining that they want to be able to laugh at work, they want to have time to have fun and enjoy life, they want to stop and smell the roses. 

Play is an essential part of life.  Some high achievers seem to be happy working all the time - but that's because they have combined work and play in a way that is highly satisfying to them.  They literally play at their work.  And that's a great goal - and one I have some growing to do before I'll achieve.

Until then,  I vow to incorporate more play into my life, starting today.  Who's with me?

Get Your Project on Track with a Free One Hour Coaching Retreat (By Telephone)

International Coach Week Special

When you're in business for yourself, it can sometimes feel like everything needs to be done at once.  And the overwhelm of that can sometimes feel like it is taking all the fun out of what started out wanting to be a fun way to make a living!

And sometimes – despite all that needs to be done – we find ourselves procrastinating, and not doing much of anything. 

Enter the Guided One Hour Retreat.  One targeted hour with Cheryl Lyon, CPC , a certified life coach with a spiritual bent, a talent for seeing into the heart of things and the ability to chunk down tasks and see the natural order of things.   

Cheryl  (that's me) loves to help creative people who sometimes feel scattered or overwhelmed use their strengths to get things done, rather than spending all of their energy beating themselves up for not having enough self-discipline… or organization… or focus… or whatever. 

Use your session to:

• Clarify your priorities and decide what needs to be done now and what can wait
• Brainstorm marketing ideas
• Get writing – on your blog, your newsletter, your webpage, or your e-book
• Figure out how to use your time more effectively – and how to take some time off
• Put together a project plan that will help you stay on track, without feeling boxed in
• Explore ways to enjoy your work more AND find time to rest and play.

A bit about Cheryl:  I help professional women, solo-preneurs, and creative types stay on purpose and find ways of working that work for them.  I am a certified life coach.  When clients leave a session with me, they are usually calmer and more grounded AND they have a path forward – a concrete, practical plan to achieve their goals in ways that work for them.  

Most  of my recent clients have been women who consider themselves right-brained or creative and who sometimes struggle to do what they perceive to be left-brained tasks and to stay on track and get things done without feeling like they are on a forced march. I love to help women connect to their whole selves, stop beating themselves up, and use their strengths to find ways of working and getting things done that work for them.

These sessions are being offered at no charge in celebration of International Coach Week, to give more people a chance to experience coaching.  In lieu of payment, I request that you make a donation in whatever amount you choose to your favorite charity.  But that is entirely up to you.

This session is a real coaching session – not a consultation.  We will spend an hour focusing on whatever in your business needs the most attention right now.  (And if you're not sure what that is, we can start with clarifying that.)    This is a one-time, free-standing session – new clients only, please.  If we are having a grand time, I will ask you if you'd like to continue to work with me – but there will be no hard sell and no obligation, just an invitation. 

How to Claim Your Session:

Simply go to my online calendar at https://my.timedriver.com/J4H6J, and book yourself in.  Sessions are available at various times next week.  Only 8 sessions are available, so claim yours now before they are gone! 

Get clear, get focused, get going - and have a bit of fun along the way!

 

P.S. This offer is not limited to business owners or business projects.  If you have a personal project you need to get moving on, I'd love to coach you, too!  Book yourself into a session in my online calendar at https://my.timedriver.com/J4H6J and choose a time that works for you.

20 Minute Meditation "Retreats" - The Real Happiness 28 Day Challenge

As you may have guessed, I am a proponent of meditation.  The reason I love meditation is that it is a spiritual practice with very down-to-earth effects.

Meditation works. On the days that I meditate (and in the weeks and months that I maintain a regular meditation practice, even if not daily), my life runs more smoothly, with a greater sense of grace and flow. I am more open to the possibilities in front of me, rather than caught  up in what I need to get done by the end of the day or the end of the week.  I am calmer, more present, and more easily able to focus.  I am better able (and more likely) to respond rather than react when challenges present themselves or someone says something that ruffles my feathers.  I more often notice when I am taking on the energy of other people, so that I can put up my shield and mitigate its effects.

What do I mean by "meditation"?  Simply a focused time of silence and openness.  Sometimes that might mean paying attention to my breath.  Sometimes it may mean gazing into the light of a candle, and inviting light to flow into and through me.  Sometimes it may mean - gently and with genuine curiosity rather than judgment - watching my thoughts or exploring my emotions.  And sometimes it is something like prayer.

My clients often ask me how to get started with meditation, or how to keep at it when their lives get busy.

One excellent resource is the book Real Happiness by Sharon Salzberg, which also includes a CD with four 20 minute audio meditations to help you get started.  This book was published in the UK under the more descriptive title: The Power of Meditation: A 28-Day Programme for Real Happiness.

I have been recommending this book to everyone I know:   Here's why:

1. It's a simple, secular, "how to" manual for getting started with a meditative practice in 28 days.  Note:  you do not have to meditate every day to "succeed" with this program.  In fact, only three 20 minute periods are "required" in the first week of the program.  And if 20 minutes is too much, you may do 10 minutes, or even 5.  The important thing is not the amount of time but your intention to meditate regularly.


2. It includes suggestions for a dozen or so different ways to meditate, so you can find one that works for you, or mix it up depending on your need or mood.


3. It does not require a certain set of religous beliefs (or any religious belief).  It is a practical, down to earth guide that provides a road map from one who has gone before - and taught countless others (include brief bio of Salzberg).  Patterns of how we can trip ourselves up.


4. Most of all, for the constant refrain of "it's never too late to begin again."  If you set aside 20 minutes to meditate and realize on minute 18 that your mind has been wandering the entire time, you simply begin again with the next breath. 


5. The hard copy book (but, alas, not the Kindle version) includes a CD with audio instructions for four of the meditations, for those who prefer to learn auditorily.

What I found from following this program last September:

• Reading just a few pages every now and again helped me digest the material and helped keep my attention on my intention.


• The audios reinforced the reading, and gave me practice "cues."


• I became much gentler (more compassionate) toward myself, and started extending the compassion I extend to others also to myself.


• I became much more aware of how critical and negative one of my inner voices is, and learned to see the critical tone as a signal that part of me was feeling neglected, or worried, and to listen for the positive message seeking to be expressed.

I am feeling the need, as I do periodically, to be more intentional about my meditation practice, so I will be taking the 28 day challenge again starting February 1st.   I invite you to join me.  The challenge does not require you to meditate for 28 days straight.  In fact, the first week "requires" that you meditate only 3 times, and only for as long as seems possible.  Five or ten minutes three times a week is enough to make a difference.

I'd love to know if you will be joining me.  Please comment below and let me know.

A One Question Retreat

What if you could love yourself the way I love you?  -God


What if you could love yourself the way God loves you?
(Feel free to substitute your own word for God or the name of the most compassionate, loving, welcoming person you know.)

What would it be like to give yourself that level of respect?

What would it be like to give yourself that much empathy and compassion?

What would it be like:

• To see your mistakes through the eyes of love, rather than judgment?
• To really claim your talents, your strengths, and your idiosyncrasies?
• To fully acknowledge your challenges, without being consumed by them?
• To know that you have a God-given right to take up space in this world?
• To treat yourself the way you would treat an honored guest? 

What would that be like?  What if you could love yourself THAT much?

National Relaxation Day - August 15th

According to a recent survey, three-quarters of Americans would like to see National Relaxation Day become a national holiday: http://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/americans-want-to-make-national-relaxation-day-an-official-holiday-127456878.html

The survey was commissioned by Princess Cruise Ships, and that could well easily have swayed the results (I'm not maligning the pollsters, just noting the source...) But a casual glance at my friends, colleagues, store clerks and other people I come into contact with every day bears out the truism that people find it hard to find time to relax.

We are being bombarded with information and asked to do more with less every day. It can sometimes feel like we live in a pressure cooker. We get lots of cooking done, but we're waiting for the day we can release the steam valve. Some days it feels like that won't happen until retirement.

Ways to release the valve:

1) Control your e-mail rather than letting it control you:
http://www.wisdomheart.org/2011/meditation-email/

2) Take a lunch break - even if it is only a 10 minute walk to the coffee shop. Getting out of the office, into the plein air will revive you and help you hit the re-set button.

3) Take a One Hour Retreat once a week. Need some ideas? Scroll down for prior posts, or sign up for my free e-book in the box to the right.

4) Take a vacation. It needn't be extravagant. It needn't even be away from home. A stay-cation can work, as long as you are committed to taking a vacation from routine. Painting your house can be a vacation - the Zen of painting is a break from the ringing phone, pinging e-mail and constant interruptions that plague many jobs.

And let it be known that, while the survey says people in general do not agree, I am firmly in the camp of experts who espouse "me" time. While I agree that it can sometimes take a couple of days to truly wind down, I also know that it is possible to relax in a single moment. And practice makes perfect.

What is your favorite way to relax? Please share it below.

Brain Decluttering a la Harry Potter

My daughter grew up on the Harry Potter books - and in some ways, so did I.  So, in honor of today's release of the last of the movie series, I offer a mind clearing technique inspired by Harry Potter.

If you are a Potter fan , you are familiar with Professor Dumbledore’s magical Pensieve.  And, if you're not a Potter fan, you have probably already stopped reading. 

The Pensieve is a stone basin etched with runes and filled with a shimmering, viscous silver substance that we eventually find out are peoples' memories.  Dumbledore, the school Headmaster, can ”download” his thoughts for retrieval and examination at a later time by pressing his magic wand to his temple and extracting material from his brain (which is, despite appearances, a harmless, painless process).  This allows him to “declutter” his mind, which aids him in focusing his full attention and considerable brain power on the matter at hand, and allows him to view his memories from a "third-person" perspective.

"I sometimes find, and I am sure you know the feeling, that I simply have too many thoughts and memories crammed into my mind.”  [Boy, do I know that feeling!] …One simply siphons the excess thoughts from one’s mind, pours them into the basin, and examines them at one’s leisure.  It becomes easier to spot patterns and links, you understand, when they are in this form.”  (Prof. Dumbledore to Harry Potter, Goblet of Fire, pg. 597)

What a wonderful invention!  How much more present, attentive and effective could I be if I could download all the clutter that rattles around in my brain?

Alas, I am a mere Muggle (a non-magical person, in Potter-speak).  What’s a poor Muggle to do?

Write it down.  Make a pencil-and-paper (or electronic) version of a Pensieve.  When my brain gets so cluttered with “to-dos” that I don’t know where to start, it often helps to “download” everything to paper.  I was reminded of that this week, when I got overwhelmed with an accumulation of big and small projects.  I was having a hard time doing anything – but then I remembered the magical Pensieve. Make a massive “To-Do” list (use your laptop or iphone if you prefer).

You may find that you have 50 to 100 items on your mind - no wonder it’s hard to focus!  Write down absolutely everything that comes to mind, whether it needs to be done in the next 5 minutes or the next 5 years, whether it will take 5 minutes or 5 years.   If it’s taking up space in your mind, download it to the paper.  Don’t worry about priority at this point.  Once it is on paper, it will be much easier to prioritize the items into “do, dump or delegate” categories,  and to set up reminder systems for those items that need attention at a later time.

Dump the baggage.  Journal, talk to a friend or coach or get therapy to unload excess baggage from the past.  Do you really want to keep cluttering your brain with that old junk?  And it’s not worth putting in the Pensieve, either.  While in the Harry Potter novels, the Pensieve is used as a flashback device to educate Harry about the events of the past and how they have shaped present reality, not all past events are worth retaining.  Most of us would be loath to give up memories of our baby’s first smile or our teenager's  junior prom, but do we really need to remember every past slight, or hold onto anger, or wallow in self-pity?

Focus.  Meditate, pray or connect with Nature to quiet your mind and access your inner wisdom.  Many people find that focusing the mind on a single point, whether it be the breath, a candle, or the presence of God, substantially quiets the internal “chatter” that often disturbs our peace.  Instead of random thoughts pinging here and there like steel marbles in a pinball machine, we can feel the wholeness of the Universe and more clearly see our direction in it.

These techniques are so powerful, they are almost like magic.  Harry Potter would be impressed.


Full disclosure:  this is an update of a post I wrote in 2007.  But it's still timely - brain decluttering is a task that needs to be repeated from time to time.   I know that I could benefit from doing it at least once a week!